sbl 2004 week 3 june 14 ass clown outdoor arena TEAM DONKEY PUNCH 19 SHORT BUS ALL-STARS 5 (6 INN) stellar offensive play by d.p. leadoff hitter elysa "snatch" farrell was more than enough to offset both the loss of punch captain jared clayton to suspension and the offensive onslaught reigned down by lee nespor. farrell was 10 for 12 from the plate with five rbi's, setting the table for fellow punchers kurt rodemoyer and pat lackey to post identical 6 for 12, 2 homer 7 rbi lines. in the field, rodemoyer turned a pair of double plays. the bright spot of the 6-run game for teddy's all-stars was the play of lee nespor, who collected all five rbi for his squad while going 5 for 5 with 4 homeruns. combined, the trio of bill weisberg, rookie todd miller and ed gilliland collected only 3 hits. PJ & THE LADIES 3 THE SERBIAN JEW DOUBLE BLUFFS 21 (6 INN) after an extremely entertaining 4 on 4 scrum won by the bluffs, the ladies came out swingin', and back to back doubles by greg "no name" lackey and lenny h. christ gave the ladies a one-run lead after the first-half inning. that was about as close as they'd get, however, as the bluffs tra-la-la'd their way to 6 runs in the home half of the inning on the strength of 8 consecutive hits highlited by matt mcclellands 3-run homer. the bluffs duplicated their first-inning run total in the third as nate tomko collected a 3-run dong, then tallied 9 runs over the final two innings thanks in part to another tomko 3-run job as well as a traditional gran slam. for the winners, mcclelland went 9 for 10 with 4 rbi, leadoff hitter shelly goodpastor hit on 5 of 8 attempts with 4 runs batted in, and tomko finished with a 7 for 10, 4 homer, 12 rbi, 3 double play line. greg lackey paced his team in a losing effort, going 2 of 6 with a homer and a pair of rbi. defensively, pj nespor recorded 3 double plays and a psyche out. HOOSIER DADDY 10 JUKEBOX HERO 9 over the first 5 innings, league-leading hoosier daddy was able to build up a solid 6-run lead thanks in part to timely hitting from dennis lackey and stingy defense which included 3 double plays and a pair of psyche-outs. jukeox hero, looking for their first win streak of the year, fought back bravely, scoring all nine of their runs over the final 4 before h.d. was able to snuff out the rally. in a losing effort, kip corbett went 5 of 9 with 2 homers and five runs batted in while turning 3 double plays in the field. lenny crist aided the heroes with a pair of late-inning psyche outs while kurt rodemoyer had a nice 4 of 9, 1 homer, 3 rbi game. in addition to lackey's 5 for 13, 2 homerun, 8 rbi, 3 psyche-out, 2 double play performance, hoosier daddy got a spark from co-captain bryan frankovich, who went 6 for 13 with 2 rbi and an assist. both team were playing without their respective captains, as mikey chang-moroco was somewhere in france or something and hero lead singer danielle hennon was selling fashionable jewelry to preteen girls. PJ & THE LADIES 5 THE SHORT BUS ALL-STARS 16 what had been billed as the game of the week-- two underachieving yet dynamic squads looking to get a huge boost by beating another veteran-led team-- and featured the return of pj nespor to the sbl, turned into more of a laugher as the ladies couldn't get their shit together and, as a result, the all-stars were able to put the game away with a huge 8-run 8th. short bus got a lucky break in the bottom of the first as lee nespor was awarded a bases-loaded grand slam after older brother pj was called for an encroachment violation while attempting the can-opener psyche-out. the ladies, of course, cried facism, but referee clayton allowed the homerun even tho the audience was divided on wether or not pj had stepped over the line. unlike the ladies of old, this was not for all intents and purposes the end of the game. even when down by 6 after 5 innings, the ladies did not, as everyone expected, go on a shoe-tossing, insult-laden rampage forcing a premature end to the game. instead they stayed focused, and it eventually paid off as shots began falling in the 6th and seventh innings, and they were able to muster up a 5-run rally highlited by big rando knights 2-run homer. however, the 5-8 game quickly turned into a bloodbath when the ladies defense shut down in that ugly 8th inning. for the victorious all-stars, one two many jew jokes turned billy weiberg into a one-man wrecking crew, as maddog had a very un-christian 8 of 11 game which included 4 rbi and 4 double plays. also for the winner, jeff pallini hit 5 of 7 shots with a homer and 5 rbi while lee nespor drove in 6. big rando knight paced the ladies with his 3 rbi, 1 homer, 2 psyche out, 2 double play line while lenny crist hit half of his 8 shots and coerced a pair of misses. HOOSIER DADDY 14 XDEATHX 4 after a half-hearted scrum from bryan frankovich in which he nearly got run over by the tank that is X captain jon biddle, the depleted hoosier daddy team, who were missing both captain moroco and top pick mark tarkanick and had just sqeaked out a one-run win over lowely jukebox herpe, hoosier daddy seemed destined to repeat the game that had knocked them from the ranks of the undefeated one week earlier, a devestating loss to XdeathX. h.d. apparantly didn't get the memo and, after both team scored only one run over the first two innings, broke out in the third with 4 runs to create a lead they would never relinquish. as XdeathX rookie billy picciotto, the only one on his team who didn't play like shit, slowly added to his team's score one solo homer at a time, hoosier daddy posted another 4 run inning in the 6th, then dennis lackey put the game away with a grand slam in the top of the ninth for yet another 4-run inning. in a winning effort, the red-hot dennis lackey hit 6 of 13 attempts with a homer and (jesus) 9 runs batted in. bryan frank added 4 rbi and 5 double plays while newcomer seth salsa hit 6 o3 13 and crossed the playe 6 times for his team. picciotto hit 3 solo shots and jon biddle tipped in 6 double plays for X, who dropped their second in a row. THE SHORT BUS ALL-STARS 2 THE SERBIAN JEW DOUBLE BLUFFS 16 (6 INNINGS) the bluffs were clicking on all cylanders for this one, collecting 19 hits in the first 6 innings while shutting down a short bus all-star lineup (one who had totaled 16 runs in their previous game) to the tune of 5 hits in 6 innings. after a scoreless first in which sbl suoerstars billy weisberg and nate tomko traded terrific double plays, the bottom fell out of the short bus defense, and the sj2b poured thru for a 7 run innings in which tomko put the finishing touches on with a three-run jack. after a relatively low scoring 2-run 3rd, the bluffs went back at it for 4 runs in the 4th as jon olsavsky hit a pair of three-baggers and collected 2 rbi in the stanza. the bluffs went to their bench after building the 11-2 lead, and rookie katie kelly, aryn christman and ben smith got the final 3 runs in the 6th thanks to a smith homerun. olsavsky was high man for his double bluffs, hitting all but one of his 7 shots, driving in two and tipping in a double play. tomko had another solid outing, hitting 3 of 4 shots with a homer and 5 rbi with an assist and a double play in 4 innings of work, and matt mcclelland went 4 of 6 with a pair of rbi. ben smith got two at-bats and used one of them to hit the three-run bang to end it. for the all-stars, todd miller collected three hits and weisberg turned 3 dp's. 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