| 2002 SBl All-Star Game Aug 11, 2002 Ass Clown Outdoor Arena American League 7 National League 19 Rosters: American National Nate Tomko, RTS PJ Nespor, PJ&L Mark Tarkanick RTS Jon Olsavsky, Pillow Billy Weisberg, Weenises Andy Esenwein, FAGS Fred Shaffer, PBG Rando Knight, PJ&L Jason Biddle, PBG the heavily favored and ultra-cocky american leaguers looked horrid from the outset, losing the 10-person scrum for the ball in disasterous fashion and allowing their pregame defeat to haunt them for the rest of the day. pj nespor drove in andy esenwein in the bottom half of the first to grab a quick one-run lead, and one which they would never flounder. with american captain nate tomko sitting out to start the game, the nl-ers quietly built a 5 point lead heading into the top of the fourth. the americans clawed back once tomko entered, cutting the lead to 7-6. as the momentum began to swing and the american league looked to stake their claim to the lead, referee/asshole/faggot kip "i suck dick" corbett whistled tomko for an intentional foul in the bottom of the 6th, sending him to the penalty box for two excuciating innings. with the league's biggest star in the sin bin, the nl caught fire, exploding for 12 runs in th seventh and eighth, highlighted by an esenwein grand slam and a pair of 4-baggers for the co-mvp that deserved it, jon olsavsky. the point was moot once tomko rejoined the action, but the game ended in fitting fashion, with tomko stroking a single to lead off the top of the ninth, then watching as his three teammates missed in succession to end the game. for the sharp-shooting nl, esenwein hit on 7 of 12 shots with 7 rbi and a homer, pj nespor finished with 2 homers and 5 rbi with a double play, and olsavsky hit 6 of 11 for 6 rbi and a pair of homeruns. rando knight contributed a dp. for the offensively inept american league, nobody besides tomko did anything except fuck up. SBL ROOKIE GAME National League 4 American League 8 rosters American National Shelly Goodpastor, RTS Sarah Hazlett, Pillow Mikey Moroco, RTS Jared Clayton, PBG Samantha Lynn, RTS Lee Nespor, FAGS Kip Corbett, Weenises Katie Burger, PJ&L (P-C) Sean Hood, PBG (P-C) Joel Lepak, PJ&L the national league proved they can score on the long ball, knocking in 4 solo homers, including back to back jobbies by burger and clayton in the top half of the 5th. they also proved that they can't do anything else. the nl failed to score a run in any other fashion, and only collected one hit that wasn't a solo shot, a 6th inning lead off triple by highly underrated sarah "death blow" hazlett. meanwhile, their al counterparts looked solid, perhas even more solid than the american all-stars, showing a nice blend of teamwork and commintment to fundamental baseketball. shelly goodpastor hit on 5 of 8 shots and drove in three to pace the americans. fellow thuner stud mikey "yeah, i'm on that team, too" moroco also drove in a trifecta, and turned an unbelievable double play in the top of the first to take the nl off their game. kip corbett failed to put up the big numbers offensively, possible because he was too focused on screwing tomko and the al all-stars out of their game because he felt, as he would later put it "snubbed". he did, however, manage 3 double plays. the al leaned out to a 4 run lead after 3 before the nl sunk their first base-clearer. as the lead slowly dwindled to 2 runs, the al put the game away with three consecutive doubles in the bottom of the 7th. the highlite of the game for the nl was torpedo joel lepak's double play. and that's really kinda sad. back |