| SBL 2005, WEEK 4 JUNE 12 AUSCHWITZ GARDENS (PJ & THE LADIES COURT #4 IN 4 WEEKS) TEAM KOOPA TROOPA 12 PJ & THE LADIES 7 despite playing without former captain and all-star bryan frankovich, team koopa troopa was able to hold off pj & the ladies in the first matchup of the season of the league's top teams. using a balanced attack, the shorthanded TKT never trailed in a game that far from lived up to it's hype. matt mcclelland and pat lackey both went 6 of 14 from the field while rookie pat o'mahoney hit in 7 of his 14 attempts. each drove in 4 runs, while o'mahoney led his team defensively with 6 double plays. the ladies got another good game from nate tomko, but were far too inconsistent at the plate to make the game interesting. they fell behind by as many as 7 early, finally finding the scoreboard in the third to bring the game to within 7-4. as the game raged on, however, the runs kept coming from koopa while the ladies just couldn't string together enough hits to make any dent in the lead. tomko finished with 5 hits in 9 at bats with 4 rbi and 4 double plays. knight contributed 4 hits and 2 double plays. RETURN OF THE WEENISES 3 ANALISA GOODTHING 2 in a most riveting of battles, the weenises took advantage of an elysa farrell-less analisa goodthing to pull of a stunning 3-2 win to get back into the race in the sbl's american conference. after a full sbl scrum was decided when ben elliott used shelley goodpastor as a human shield in order to matriculate the ball past the finish line, absolutely nothing interesting happened until the ninth inning. in the ninth with the game knotted at 2, the visiting weenises got a leadoff single by lenny crist (his only hit of the day) to put a little life into the game. he was driven in one batter later by a triple from none other than samantha lynn, who was appearing in her first sbl game since george w. bush was almost re-elected. a ben elliott double play stifled the rally, but the damage had been done as the ROTW headed into the bottom of the ninth cradling a one-run lead. jon olsavsky's leadoff single attempt went in and out, and terry shernisky put back his 6th double play of the contest to bring AGT to their final out. freshly home from iraq, none other than steve condo stepped up to the homer line in an attempt to tie the game with one shot, and promply got psyched out by lenny crist, tossing up an airball that wouldn't have come close if teddy ballgame himself was the basketball hoop. in addition to his 6 double plays, shernisky drove in 2 of the weenises runs. crist tallied to psyche outs in the contest. for the losers, olsavsky was, sadly, the high man for his team with a 3 for 9, 1 rbi showing. UNCLE JED'S POCKET WATCH 1 THE FUPALOOTERS 16 (8 INNINGS) brandon mckendry, having been battling an acute case of suck all season, finally came to life and, as a result, the fupalooters finally began playing like they should have been all along. by putting up a 6 for 10 game with 2 homers, 6 rbi and 3 double plays, mckendry picked up the slack left by the vacationing jon biddle, driving in both the first run of the contest via a triple in the first and the game ender, a walkoff solo jack in the eighth. fupa scored 6 runs in both the second and fourth frames, and had built a commanding 13-run cushion by the time shelley goodpastor drove in the lone run for uncle jed with a 2-out double in the fifth. in addition to mckendry, fupa got a productive day out of rookie mike devito, who hit on 6 of 9 shots with 3 homers and 7 rbi. greg lackey also continued his solid play, connection on half of his ten shots with 2 ribbies and 2 double plays. corbett turned 3 double plays for jed, who were forced to play without dank elly and kurt rodemoyer. TRAIN ON TERRY SHERNISKY 7 PJ & THE LADIES 8 billy weisberg, on the cusp of being overthrown by his team for playing like such a douchebag, finally came through for PJ&L when they needed him most, hitting a game-winning solo homer to prevent a loss that would have made it two in a row and 3 of 4 for the ladies. the game got off to an explosive start as steve condo (who plays for neither team) took it upon himself to enter the 4-on-1 T.O.T.S. vs. tomko scrum, then paid the price in the form of a barrage of blows to the melon fucking head. the start of the contest was delayed momentarily as tomko was being restrained after condo threatened to "gut" him, but once the contest did get underway, it turned out to be a good one. in spite of stranding runners like ted eats cheeseburgers (18 left on base in all), the ladies built a 7-1 lead over the first 8 innings. sensing victory, tomko once again got physical, this time hockey fighting the man-beast patrick nespor. nespor retaliated, attempting to frankensteiner tomko, and both were thrown in the sin bin for the remainder of the game. rando knight, not wanting to miss the party, tackled sean hood as he attempted his next shot, then ran away with the ball, earning himself a length of the game suspension as well. with tomko and knight gang-humping nespor in the box, aryn christman was left alone down low, and the weakened lady defense was just what the T.O.T.S. needed to get back into the game. following a few extra-base hits, ben smith broke out of his game-long slump to knot the game at 7 with a 2-out, 2-run homer. weisberg, desperately needing to come through to avoid a possible gutting himelf, calmly swished through the first shot of the inning to drive in his only run of the game, and possibly the biggest of the ladies season. before being sent to the penalty box, tomko hit on 6 of 10 shots, drove in 2, turned 7 double plays, and was credited with a psyche out, a dumb thing, and an assist that he doesn't remember getting. also for the ladies, aryn christman finally came around, banging home 6 shot, driving in 3, and squeaking like a girl down low. smith led his team with 4 ribbies and 2 double plays. the ladies improved their mark to 6-2 with the win. TEAM KOOPA TROOPA 12 RETURN OF THE WEENISES 8 as they have all season, team koopa troopa was able to use one big inning to springboard themselves to a win, this time crossing the dish 6 times in the third inning to build a lead from which the weenises would never recover. playing even more shorthanded that they were before (erin hayden in the lineup over pat o'mahoney) but once again getting to lock horns with another understaffed team (a weenis squad without captain dennis lackey), koopa once again prevailed with a balanced attack from the one-two punch of matt mcclelland and pat lackey. mac put up an 8 of 13 line with a homer, 5 ribbies and 4 double plays to pace his squad, but lackey wasn't far behind, banging in 6 hits and 5 rbi himself. the weenises, who kept the game close until the final 2 innings, got another big game from rookie of the year frontrunner terry shernisky, who hit on 5 of 8 attempts with a pair of homers, a quintet of rbi's and 5 double plays on the defensive side. danielle hennon, seeing significant playing time for the first time all season, added two rbi. lenny crist was credited with 3 psyche outs, but they were all on erin hayden, so we probably shouldn't count any of them. koopa now sits atop the sbl at 7-1, while the weenises dropped to 3-5. JUKEBOX HERO 6 THE FUPALOOTERS 16 real ugly game here, or at least as ugly as a game can be when it features aryn christman, sam lynn, anna anzio and erin hayden. the only this of note that happened? the breaking of the sbl's color barrier as jukebox rookie and admitted black man terry hall made his sbl debut. i know what you're thinking... what's next, eskimos? anyway, you can pretty much take the writeup from the last fupalooters game and insert it right here, cause it was pretty much the same thing. greg lackey and jason biddle got on base, brandon mckendry and mike devito drove them in. mckednry put up a 5 for 11, 3 homer, 6 rbi, 2 double play line. mike devito put up a 5 for 11, 2 homer, 5 rbi, 2 double play line. i'm not actually checking, but those seems pretty damn similair to the ones i typed a little bit ago. for jukebox, aryn christman hit in 5 of her 9 at-bats and drove in 2 while turning the only jukebox double play. so way to go, aryn. |
| ANALISA GOODTHING 13 JUKEBOX HERO 4 the return of elysa farrell worked wonders for the analisa goodthing offense, which went from a 2-run outing to a 13-run outing which saw them put up two runs before the first out of the game was recorded. not surprisingly against a team featuring 3 rookies, the savvy AGT used their normal combination of smallball and timely hitting to get the job done, scoring 3 runs in the fifth and 6 in the 7th to put the game away with time to spare. goodthing left only 5 runners on base all game long. jukebox, conversely, couldn't get much going on offense at all. while jamie fabian did connect on two hits to boost his average above zero for the first time in history, fellow jukebox rookie jimmy holl stepped down to take his place, pouring in zero hits in 8 at-bats to keep the cataldi watch full for at least one more week. the lone bright spot for jukebox was jeff knight, who, with his son and baby mama in the house, went three for seven with a homer, 3 rbi, a pair of double plays and an assist. for AGT, elysa farrell drowned out the chorus of boos she recieved every time she stepped up to bat to put up 8 hits and 4 rbi with 1 double play. ben elliott chipped in with 5 ribbies and 5 hits, while olsavsky connected on 6 hits and drove in 4. the loss was jukebox hero's seventh in a row following a season opening win. AGT improved to 5-3. TRAIN ON TERRY SHERNISKY 12 UNCLE JED'S POCKET WATCH 13 (13 innings) in what was by far the most exciting matchup of the afternoon, uncle jed needed four extra frames to finally put away a very game T.O.T.S. team and get back on the winning track following an embarassing 15-run loss earlier in the day. uncle jed got off to an early 3-0 lead in the second when kip corbett, shelley goodpastor and lee nespor made in three solo shots in a row from the homer line. having failed to reach base in any of the first three innings, the tots came on in style, scoring 7 runs in a fourth inning highlighted by katie kelly's 2-run homerun. the stanze saw all members of the tots connect for at least two hits. ben smith's squad would be silenced over the next 4 innings, however, as jed would quickly rebuild their lead. led by the always solid goodpastor and aided by some timely homer shooting from kip corbett, jed would get 3 more runs in their half of the fourth to pull to within one run, then put up five more in the fifth to take a considerable lead and breathe a little easier. the defenses took over down the stretch, with kip corbett and shelley goodpastor each tipping in a pair of double plays in the next four frames and jeff knight and ben smith doing the work inside for the former brooklyn bridges, suede denim secret police and tots. in the ninth, still down 12-7, the train on terry shernisky bats once again came alive. kelly and knight recorded back to back double to start the inning, but a corbett double play would momentarily silence the rally. pat nespor came up to hit a big single to keep the game going, and katie kelly's double would make the score 9-12 and bring the tying run to the plate in the form of rookie jeff knight, who had been red hot all day long. knight, with the poise of a 5-year veteran, drained the game tying homer. the tots then threatened to take the lead, putting runners on second and third before finally fizzling out. needing only one to win, uncle jed naturally went down 1-2-3 in the bottom of the ninth. and onto extra innings we went. neither team seemed to want to win the game, as the two squads combined for only one hit in innings 10 through 12 and a half. it did provide us with some nice defensive plays, as the sbl got to see and effortless acrobatic tip-in from jeff knight and equally impressive fallaway d.p.'s from uncle jed's corbett and nespor. finally, in the bottom of the 13th, shelley goodpastor had seen enough. she led off the inning with a double to bring the corwd to it's feet, then watched as her teammates missed a couple of gimmies. at one point, referee billy weisberg actually advised corbett and nespor to just toss the ball over the house to prevent double plays and allow shelley to shoot again, but the stubbor men refused to do it the easy way, instead counting on luck to not allow their misses to be tipped in. anyway, when shelley was finally given the chance to end the game with a double, she obviously did it, ending sbl week 4 with one flick of the wrists. and ben smith got steamed. goodpastor finished with 12 hits in 17 at-bats with a homer, 5 ribbies and 2 double plays. corbett added a pair of homer, 6 rbi and 5 d.p.'s. in a losing effort, katie kelly went 6 of 11 and drove in 4. jeff knight contributed 5 runs batted in and a pair of double plays while ben smith tipped in 3 jed misses. the loss slips the tots to last in the american conference with a 3-5 record. uncle jed now sits at 3-5 and in third in the national division. the season series between the teams is tied at 1 all. PLAYER OF THE WEEK- brandon mckendry, the fupalooters (11 of 21, 5 homers, 12 rbi, 5 double plays) TEAM OF THE WEEK- the fupalooters (10-6 over jukebox and a fifteen run beatdown of uncle jed. it could have been koopa troopa, but they lost to two teams that weren't at full strength) GAME OF THE WEEK- tots vs. jed (not even close. any time a game goes 13, it's good) 2005 SCHEDULE |