| SBL 2007, WEEK 9 JULY 15 THE TUBBIETRONIC SUPERDROME since i'm getting a little burned out with these writeups, and frankly i don't want to relive much of last weekend (the only thing that can make a bad hangover worse is getting pummeled by 14 runs when you're actually playing well), i'm gonna breeze through these pretty quick this week. but i'll make sure and hit the important parts... PJ & THE LADIES 7 HOT FUZZ 23 (7 INNINGS) so i says to rando and billy heading into the week, "you guys are playing the hos and hot fuzz sunday. you can really, really help us out here with a couple wins". naturally, the ladies do to me what i normally do to them- screw the shit out of me. assholes. that gavin kid went off. he hit 10 of 11 shots (one of which was a grand slam) and narrowly missed becoming the first player in 3 seasons to record a perfect game. i'd say he pretty much wrapped up the rookie of the year with this one. plus, he had 9 runs batted in and an assist. bryan frankovich also drove in 9, hit 3 homers, and tipped in 6 double plays and an assist. dennis lackey showed up, thank god, or the ladies would have gotten shut out. he drove in all seven of their runs on 5 for 7 shooting with 3 longballs. rando knight and pj nespor evenly divided 4 double plays. PJ & THE LADIES 10 THE NAPPY HEADED HOS 7 well, at least they beat the hos. or, at least they were on the court when the hos decided to beat themselves. what happened to this hos squad? weren't they right in the mix a few weekends ago? right now mac, ben and jamie are about as intimidating as the nespor dog is, barking at me from under the kitchen table. the ladies didn't exactly light it up, but had a nice, balanced attack. pj nespor hit 6 of his 10 shots and drove in a trio of runs to lead the way. billy weisberg also drove in 3 on 4 for 11 marksmanship with 3 double plays. dennis lackey tipped in 4 d.p.'s. isn't it strange how the ladies divvy up their double plays. pj and rando get them all the first game, then it's like they step back and say, "dennis, jewbagel- get yours now" strange: jamie moroco hit 4 of 10 with 3 rbi. mcclelland tipped in 3 double plays. HOT FUZZ 11 THE SERBIAN JEW DOUBLE BLUFF JUKEBOX HERO EXPERIENCE 8 alright, so i tried to screw frankovich and it came back and bit me in the ass. not only did frankovich actually win the game, but now i've tarnished the legacy of one of the greatest teams in all of sports history. god i hate frankovich. but, in my defense, i would have drilled that game-ending walkoff grand slam had b.frank not tried to bum rush me while i was attempting the shot. and, of course, stupid ref just stands there with the whistle in his mouth staring like a retard. oh, and the bluffs didn't have shelley. she'd have helped. i'm actually starting to hate this gavin st. john as much as frankovich. alright, alright, not that much. but maybe as much as pat omahoney. where does he pull this 9 for 11 shit from? plus, he tipped in a pair of double plays and hit a homerun. he's an asshole, too. speaking of people i hate, pat nespor hit 7 of 10 and drove in 4. and we'll get to why he sucks a little later. for the bluffs, matt mcclelland came off the bench to hit 4 of 6 shots with a homerun and 3 rbi, as well as 2 double plays. ben smith hit half of his 6 shots for three ribbies. THE SCREAMIN' SEAGULLS 11 THE SPARKLING WIGGLES 20 beating up on the seagulls made me feel better after watching my beloved double bluffs fall for the first time in 23 games and 3 years. plus, since they were the only team to beat us in the last 4 weeks, the revenge was sweet. if terry "the kid who only hit homers" hall could actually hit something other than homers (3 longballs aren't impressive when you go 3 for 14), the seagulls probably win way more games than they lose. with jon olsavsky (7 for 13) and lee nespor (7 for 13) playing well, it makes no sense as to why this team gets beat from pillar to post in this one. it's like jon o. convinced lee to stop going yard, but the evil somehow got passed on to terry. yeah, i said it: terry hall is the new lee nespor. you think he's a good player based on rbi and homerun totals, then you see that batting average. the wiggles, meanwhile, just keep on looking good. and we're not playing too bad, either. nate tomko drove in 11 runs on 10 for 14 shooting with 5 homers and 5 double plays. both pat lackey and katie kelly hit 9 shots and drove in 4 and 5, respectively. KATHLEEN TURNER OVERDRIVE 25 TEAM DOUBLE STUFF 30 yeah, that's right, i called this upset! booya! did nate tomko perhaps have inside knowledge that george "the round mound of rebound/i'd have owned the rookie of the year voting had i started playing two weeks ago" kovac would be showing up at the superdrome and suiting up for the stuff? perhaps i did, perhaps i didn't- but i did know about that smuggler jeff that a.c.'s been hanging out with. and his last name had better not be knight, or i'm trading aryn to frankovich's team so every player in the sbl i hate is all on one squad. jeff knight: what a bitch. but i digest. while george is gonna get a lot of credit for turning around double stuff with his 11 for 18, 4 homer, 14 rbi, 3 double play performance, what about jamie fabians 14 for 18, 7 rbi, 2 double play outing. wow. and christman didn't do so shabby, either, hitting 12 of 19 shots with 9 ribbies. i guess nobody was calling out her back fat. for the losers, terry shernisky just keeps on carrying his team on his back. this time, his 14 for 19, 2 homerun, 13 rbi, 1 ast, 5 double play line wasn't quite enough. brother lou chipped in 11 hits and 9 rbi. shernisky has just been making the league his bitch for the last three or four weeks. not so long ago, he wasn't even in the player of the year race, it was pretty much a one horse show with a frankovich making a futile case for himself. now, after what seems like 80 rbi in 6 games, sherry has pulled neck and neck with tomko. it's so exciting! JUKEBOX HERO 15 THE SCREAMIN' SEAGULLS 16 a pretty good jukebox squad somehow managed to wrestle defeat from the jaws of victory, as the seagulls got a huge win to stay out of the sbl's basement and avoid what would have been a disasterous blow to their postseason hopes. terry hall hit 4 of 14 shots and drove in 4 on 3... waitaminute! only 3 homers?!?! well that means he had to have hit something other than a homer. what a happy day for you and your family, terry! also for the winners, jon olsavsky continued his late season push for the all-star game with an 8 for 14, 3 homer, 8 rbi, 1 psyche out, 1 double play game. leebone nespor added 6 hits, 2 homers and 4 rbi, as well as his first psyche out in 5 weeks. rando knight got 6 hits in 10 at bats to pace jukebox. he tipped in 3 double plays, and drove in 3 runs. jamie moroco hit on 8 of 10 shots with a homer and 4 rbi, while george kovac drove in seven with 3 homers. nate tomko, jeanne mentrek and pat nespor also played for the 'box. KATHLEEN TURNER OVERDRIVE 41 THE SPARKLING WIGGLES 28 this game never happened. terry shernisky never drove in 23 runs. it was all in your mind. stop smoking the ditch weed. |
| THE NAPPY HEADED HOS 16 TEAM DOUBLE STUFF 22 i'm gonna throw out some props here. could matt mcclelland, ben smith and jamie moroco played with just three and possibly won this one? yup. but did they insert jeanne "the human psyche out" mentrek into their lineup anyway? yup. this is what baseketball is all about, frankovich. play your rookies even if they don't bat .550. god i hate frankovich. george kovac, should he comme next week, may actually do enough in only 2 weeks of work to win the rookie of the year award. nobody in their right mind would say gavin st. john is a better player, but having an 8 week head start can work wonders. george went for 6 rbi on 9 of 15 marksmanship with 3 homers, 2 psyche outs and an assist. aryn christman led her squad with 10 hits in 15 tries with 3 homers and 11 rbi, as well as 2 double plays. jamie fabian conntinued his player of the year run with an 8 for 14, 5 rbi, 4 double play day. for the hos, benny smiff hit 8 of 11 shots with 2 jacks, 8rbi and 3 double plays. jamie moroco chipped in 8 hits and a quartet of ribbies. the loss drops the hos out of position for a first-round bye at 10-8. double stuff sits two games behind at 8-10. PLAYER OF THE WEEK: terry shernisky (he drove in 36 runs in 2 games. damn) TEAM OF THE WEEK: team double stuff (beating KTO and the hos is no small feat) GAME OF THE WEEK: wiggles/KTO (run total: 69!!!!!) REFEREE OF THE WEEK: not pat nespor. he butchered a call on me, then made a smart-ass comment along the lines of "next time i'll try to make sure my reffing is up to your standards, nate". well hell yeah, patrick, that's kind of the point considering i wrote the goddam rule book and all. fucking lousky reffing. nothing in the league pisses me off more than shoddy reffing. except frankovich. god i hate frankovich SCHED2007. |