FACT OR FICTION 2008
round 1
featuring the fof styling of SBL hall of famers
Big Rando Knight and Nate Tomko
1) VOLTRON WILL EMERGE FROM WEEK ONE WITH A BETTER RECORD THAN THE
Nate: Fact. Assuming voltron
comes in tact (read: Jamie Fabian shows up), which as of now looks to be the
case, I don’t see them losing to either the banana democracy, which will be
their tougher game, or the
Big Rando: fiction. it's hard to say what's going to happen in week
1. i haven't talked to jamie fabes in at least a month
but i wouldn't be surprised if he doesn't show up. in his absence billy would be
playing either battyani or derek
lockovich which is a bit of a downgrade. i'd say voltron
goes 1-1, while i think the queens will go 2-0.
2) THE DEEPEST ROSTER IN THE LEAGUE BELONGS TO TERRY SHERNISKY’S LASER CATS
Nate: Fiction. I would have agreed last week at this time,
before I decided Esenwein won’t be playing on our
team this season. But now, I’m gonna have to go with oatcake. They have Shelley Goodpastor,
who is back from the dead and taking an internship in
Big Rando: eh? i just got done looking at the rosters and i think it would be hard to actually consider any of these
teams "deep." if nate misses as many weeks
as he says he might, this team loses pretty much all of it's depth, but with shernisky still there, it doesn't really matter. having nate and terry on the same
team pretty much gives you all the depth you need, but behind them is bob spohn, who had a so-so debut last year and mostly unproven
rookies.
3) THE BEST TEAM NAME THIS SEASON BELONGS TO THE
Nate: Fact. I’m a big fan of all
the team names this season... well, except maybe that oatcake hate monster
thing, which I’m sure is just some inside joke between two people that I’m just
never going to understand. For the first time in a long time our
team names just aren’t a bunch of ridiculous names for sexual maneuvers, which
is funny once or twice, but gets lame pretty fast. Voltron is just
awesome, but I’ve always been partial to the longer names that require some
work to make fit onto a jersey.
Big Rando: fact. hands down. there
are some good team names this year, but the fact that frankovich
is the captain of the queens makes it even better
4) WITH TOMKO AND SHERNISKY SPENDING ALL SUMMER SPLITTING STATS, SOMEONE
ELSE WILL WIN THE PLAYER OF THE YEAR AWARD
Nate: Fiction. Man, this is honestly the toughest one. I actually skipped over it the first time and
had to come back. For the rest of the
SBL, and Bryan Frankovich in particular, this has to
be their best shot. There is absolutely
no way either me or Shernisky will get near the
numbers we had last year playing together in ‘08, but you can pretty much
sharpie both of us up both for 30hr, a .650 avg, 110+
rbi, 10 assists and 60
double plays. Those numbers are going to
be really tough to beat, especially if the voting panel takes into
consideration that we played together.
However, if a Frank or Moroco or Mcclelland or Blackie or Billy puts up gaudy enough
numbers, this will definitely be the season to get recognized. Still, I think it’s more likely me and ter-bear split the POTY than someone else sneaks off with
it.
Big Rando: fiction. once again this depends on how
much time nate misses. with
this team there's always going to be someone on base, and nate
and terry are the 2 best in the league at putting those runners in. if nate doesn't miss much time it will be a pretty heated
battle, but if he misses more than 2 weeks i think shernisky runs away with it.
(Ed. Note- I meant someone
other than tomko or shernisky
will win the POTY, but I guess it was kind of vague so you get to read not only
nate and rando’s
answers, but also get a peek at their interpretations of the question as well!)
5) JAMIE MOROCO WILL PLAY IN LESS THAN 10 GAMES THIS SEASON
Nate: Fiction.
I’ve known Jamie Moroco for a really long
time, and I’ve heard Jamie Moroco talk about missing
big chunks of baseketball for a really long
time. She never really does. In fact, for the last few years, she’s driven
back from
Big Rando: fact. she told me that on the phone yesterday
Nate: Oh. Fact.
6) THE FLESHY FUNBRIDGES OF CAPTAIN BIG RANDO KNIGHT WILL WIN AT LEAST 8
GAMES THIS SEASON
Nate: Fact. In many ways, the answer to this question is
directly tied in to number 5 up there.
I’m pretty confident George will be around plenty this summer, and I’m
also very certain Biddle will not. The funbridges bench, tho reliable,
won’t be producing a lot of runs or preventing many, either. George and Rando
cannot do it alone, meaning they’re gonna need Jamie
as often as possible. If she comes, as
I’ve already given my thoughts on, 8 wins is very attainable. Also, I wouldn’t be that surprised to see
someone off a stacked roster- maybe the laser cats or oatcake- end up playing
in the brown and pink if my good friend rando needs a
little more help.
Big Rando: fact. i'm the captain so it kind of makes it hard for me to
say otherwise, but i think we can pull it off. i talked to george and he told me
he'd be there every week, but it's going to be tough to win without biddle and jamie, which is what we'll
have to do because both of them have said they won't be here very often. everyone i drafted will be here
most of the time. i think
most of this season will ride on how well they play, but i
think we'll win at least 8
7) SOME TEAM FULL OF PEOPLE THAT HAVEN’T PLAYED IN A YEAR WILL NEVERTHELESS
PUT UP 30 RUNS AT ASS CLOWN OUTDOOR ARENA IN AN OPENING DAY GAME
Nate: Hmmm….. Fact. Ass Clown is a hitters park, and that oatcake/jukebox game just has mollywhopping written all over it. The oatcake hate monsters will score a ton of
runs on anyone, much less a riffraff bunch like jukebox. Week one is always loaded with people who
will come very little, if ever again, and players who have never so much as
seen the movie baseketball. Boys bring their unathletic
girlfriends, who would much rather be shopping for really big sunglasses or
boots with the fur, and the gym class rejects who couldn’t survive a rousing
game of Sharon high speedball crawl out of the woodwork thinking maybe, just
maybe baseketball is the semi-athletic psuedosport for them.
The point I’m trying to make is that the jukebox rosters this opening
day will carry on the traditions of other opening day jukeox
rosters, so expect a lot of Jason Jennings, Brendan Radcliffe,
Taylor Cataldi, Emily Wiercinski,
Katie Burger, Scott Lewis, Rob Chavara, Lindsey Landfried, Princess Adelay-types,
who will stand by, hell…part the way, while Terry Hall and Matt Mcclelland tip home assist after assist, extending every
single inning while Katie Kelly drains double after run-scoring double.
Big Rando: fact. bill
and