It's May already, just over a couple of weeks before we kick off the SBL's seventh season. Damn! That also means that I've been writing this thing for three months. I never thought it would last three weeks! And who knows? Since school is over and I actually have that thing called "free time" for a few weeks, I may actually pump out a good article or two. Don't hold your breath.
This has been a big week in the SBL. Preseason predictions are out (and some people even believe Frankovich may win something). The schedule has been set (so now you know weeks in advance when your team will get its ass kicked by the Nappy Headed Ho's). And hey, Cinco de Mayo is tomorrow. Is there a better way to celebrate the Mexican Independence Day than by unveiling the 2007 preseason All-American squad? That's right, there is no better way. Just sit back, relax, and pop open a bottle of Corona (or Dos Equis) while I reveal to you the Official SBL 2007 preseason All-American Team!
You can also mouseover the names for a pretty picture...because I care.
First Team
Nate Tomko, Sparkling Wiggles
Leading off this list is the reigning Player of the Year. This man has done it all: SBL titles, POTY titles, all-star apperances in every season, first-team All-American (pre- and post-season) every year, batting titles, etc. There's also that whole thing about being a co-founder of the league and being inducted into its initial Hall of Fame class. However, it is possible that Mr. Hennon may not be in the valley for the entire SBL season, due to opening Lubes across the country. He may miss four to five weeks. If that happens, while I still would expect him to be an all-star at season's end, it will be interesting to see where he ends up on the post-season team. Regardless, you would be crazy to leave him off of the first-team for the preseason based on what he has accomplished. If he doesn't miss significant time, look out. He will be eager to prove that he is better than Terry Shernisky or Bryan Frankovich. I don't feel like estimating his stats, but they will probably be good. This team is fucked without him.
Bryan Frankovich, Hot Fuzz
Could this finally be the year young B-Frank has been waiting for? No les than two of our "experts" thought that he would win his first ever SBL World Championship and three thought he would snatch the POTY trophy from Nate Tomko. One expert even predicted both things to happen. While we do make fun of him a lot off the court, we can't do anythign but respect him on it. Simply put, this kid is the future of the SBL. With his buddy, Mikey Moroco, by his side, he is a real threat this year. While my gut feeling says, "not this year", he will be fully mature as a player by August. He should finish the year with 30+ HR, 100+ RBI, and a .600 AVG give or take. I do not think he will duplicate last year's 113 DP campaign (as Mikey will take some away from him), but I do believe he will be in the top 5 for that category. 80 double plays seem more realistic.
Terry Shernisky, Kathleen Turner Overdrive
There are some out there who believe that Sherry, not B-Frank will wrest the POTY trophy from Nate this year. Others believe he will repeat as SBL champion. When the league President believes he will win both, that speaks volumes. It's tough to make a case against him. Last year, he put up numbers that would have won him the Player of the Year in four of the leagues six seasons. While he is a great defensive player, that is the one area of his game that will need to improve (if any), as Tomko and Frankovich are more sound defenders. That may be nitpicking, and probably is, but his double play numbers were nowhere near where Tomko's and Frankovich's were and his 2006 total of 52 is actually less than his 2005 total of 66. I would expect that number to jump back up a little bit, but not too much as rookie Tony Mastrian may steal some away. Let's say 65-70 DP for Terry, along with 25 HR, .625 AVG and around 100 RBI.
Mikey Moroco, Hot Fuzz
It's been said many times before: the talent level drops off a bit after the big three. The best argument for the fourth best player can be made for Mikey Moroco. He's been to the finals every year except last year, and has never lost a playoff series except for in the finals (remember that his team lost a play-in game in 2006). Individually, he has improved every season and is more than capable of playing with the big boys. While he will play second banana to rumored-beau Bryan Frankovich, that will not stop him from having a great season and possibly become a darkhorse in the POTY race, or at least be named a finalist. I will say that his average and home run totals should improve from last year, as he had an unexpected sub-.500 campaign. His RBI and DP totals will likely fall due to the presence of Frankovich. His dumb thing total will likely rise due to the fact that he is Mikey Moroco. I'm sure he would gladly trade some statistics for another berth in the finals.
Aryn Christman, Team Double Stuff
Honestly, there are a number of players who can go here. Ben Smith, Matt McClelland, Jon Olsavsky, Jon Biddle, and Shelley Goodpastor are some names you may have expected to see in this spot. One reason why they're not is because of reliability. Another reason is because Christman may very well become Shelley Goodpastor with defense. That's if she hasn't already. She may not get the playing time on defense, being surrounded by Dank, Jon Biddle, and Ben Elliot, but watch out if she does. She will likely break her own record of most double plays by a female (15 in 2006). "Wild Thing" is a sure thing to hit at least .625, maybe even .650 or higher. She may not produce the RBIs that Shelley Goodpastor did, but then again, maybe she will. Unlike some leadoff hitters, Aryn isn't afraid to step outside and hit some big shots. She should be known as the best female player in the league being that Shelley is more likely to be seen on Unsolved Mysteries than a SBL court these days.
Second Team
Ben Smith, Nappy Headed Ho's
So hard to put him on the first-team, yet so difficult. Here he is on the second-team, thanks to a 2006 season which saw two different players in one. The regular season version saw a Smith who couldn't hit the broad side of a barn with a basketball, much less the inside of a rim. The playoff version saw an explosive, clutch shooting offensive player who wasn't too shabby on defense (until the finals, that is). Nobody knows for sure what to expect from him in 2007, but this could very well be his best season yet. 2005 offensive numbers, improved defense, and that elusive post-Serbian Jew Double Bluff left-eye are all possible here. Add in the fact that he's at that point in his life where he may go elsewhere for work, and there may be some pressure to do something big in 2007. Then again, you never know with the most consistently inconsistant player in the league.
Terry Hall, Screamin' Seagulls
He deserves to be on this list. He's a good defender, good shooter, as well as a good scrummer, and should get some assists and psyche outs to boot. If he comes regularly and has his heart and head in the game, the sky's the limit for yount Terry Hall. As it is, he finished the 2006 season in the same spot he is not and some even believed that he was a potential POTY finalist midway through the season. He's surrounded by great and more experienced talent, which should only help his game more. We haven't seen all that he can do yet, but 20 HR, 80 RBI, .500+ AVG, 50 DP, and a few assists are all within his range. He seems to be the key for the Screamin' Seagulls, if not for his on court talents, but for the fact that Jon Olsavsky and himself are pretty good friends. Terry Hall apperances will probably equal Jon O. appearances, which also equals a higher probability of the Screamin' Seagulls going far in the playoffs.
Matt McClelland, Nappy Headed Ho's
Although he still lives in Altoona, one would expect Mac more times than not this season. He will almost surely miss a few weeks, but when he's around, he provides a consistent offensive and defensive force, in addition to being one of the top scrummers in the game. The last time Mac was on a team with Ben Smith was also the last time he won a championship (or even been to the finals) and the last time he won the Player of the Year award. Sure, it was a stacked team, but the two know each other well, so there should be some good chemistry here. Expect a return to the plus side of a .600 AVG, along with a handful of homers and double plays. The RBI total will likely be higher than the 40s of 2003-2004 but lower than the 70-80 range of the past two seasons. I don't think, however, that we will be measuring Mac's worth in RBIs. It's how many times Ben Smith drives him in that's important for his team.
Jon Olsavsky, Screamin' Seagulls
Didn't put up his best numbers last year, but I feel that he's a much better fit for this team. He should be much happier as well, bringing his 2007 numbers up from his 2006 totals. Although rumors have been circulating about his retirement for the past few years, one would think that if he didn't retire before the 2004, 2005, or 2006 seasons, that he should be around for this year. Let's not forget to mention that he, along with Nate Tomko, was inducted into the initial Hall of Fame class of 2004. This man is a legend who can still get it done. There aren't many weaknesses in his game. I expect Jon O. to show up more this season than last and have much better numbers. .550 AVG, 75 RBI, 30 DP, and a few psyche outs are all within his range. He will need to be a leader if he wants to play more than just a game or two in August.
Billy Weisberg, PJ & the Ladies
Along with Jon O., Billy very narrowly beats out Katie Kelly and Jon Biddle for the last couple spots on this list. Why? Because he has always been a great personality on and off the SBL court. While the other names listed will pass him up soon (if they haven't already), the Jewish Hammer needs to be recognized. Ever the fan favorite, he has also been on six all-star teams. Only he and Nate Tomko can say that. Plus, I would feel guilty completing the All-American squad without a single member of PJ & the Ladies. A great defender and solid run producer, one thing that he needs to work on is his batting average. While he has never been known for having a high average, he could at least be on the plus side of .400 this year. His .398 average of last year was his lowest since 2001, a time when SBL offenses were back in the stone age. This would also be a hell of a time to break the .500 barrier, something he has never done before.
Honorable Mention
Jon Biddle, Team Double Stuff: Looking to break the 100 DP barrier and move up on this list by August, but needs to play better on offense.
Katie Kelly, Sparkling Wiggles: Tough to leave her off the list, but needs to move behind the single line more often.
Dank Elly, Team Double Stuff: 2004 Rookie of the Year should be an All-Star.
Rando Knight, PJ & the Ladies: Somehow finds his way onto All-Star teams every season.
Did I mention there were a couple Easter eggs?
Well, I hope you enjoyed this week's article. I will make the 2007 All-Americans page sometime next week. Until then, drink up!