Esteemed fans of the SBL,

 

It is my great privilege to roll out a new column this week entitled Mac’s Mailbag. I have asked several people to contribute to this week’s first column in hopes that more of you will contribute in the future.

 

And I expect Ben Smith to only have one question on here next time. Please send questions to mmcclelland@gmail.com.

 

Regards,

Mac

 

 

 

Dear Mac,

 

Picking Frankovich to win it all? What are you thinking?

 

Sincerely,

Skeptical in Sharon

 

Dear Skeptical,

 

Well, I think people are looking at it the wrong way. My pick has very little to do with Frankovich becoming more clutch, and everything to do with him being re-paired with Mikey, one of the most clutch and vastly improved players in the game. This duo was good with Hoosier Daddy…they will be even better now that Mikey has found a life outside his lover.

 

Dear Mac,

 

Do you lose sleep over losing to Hoosier Daddy in the first week of the 2004 season?

 

Regards,

Heckling from Hermitage

 

Dear Heckling,

 

I actually get this question/comment a lot. People always think that it bothers me being that close to perfection and not achieve it. This thought is especially prevalent from newer people to the league. The only thing I regret about that game is that with Nate out of town, the write-up for that game didn’t get done. Thus, people forget that two of our starring four players and two of our hot high school rookies weren’t there- leaving the starting four of Jon, myself, a first time Ben Smith, and “fat” Tony Merrilo. Being that John and I have very similar games, we weren’t a good pair to lead the team…and it showed on the court. The lack of a write-up also neglects to mentioned that Hoosier Daddy, already stacked with Bryan, Mikey, and Brandon McKendry, also had Mark Tarkanick, one of the best players nobody seems to remember. Add in the fact that these four all had the game of their lives, and the fact that Jon and I only missed like 1 or 2 shots each didn’t matter. This is not to take away from what they did that day…only to point out that it would have been a different game had Nate, Shelley, Katie, and Aryn been there. Honestly with the way they were shooting, I still think they would have won…but it wouldn’t have been the route it was.

 

Dear Mac,

 

What is the most amazing thing you have witnessed in Baseketball?

 

Love,

Pining in Pittsburgh

 

Dear Pining,

 

This may be the hardest question of the week…as I have seen hundreds of amazing things during my career. Oddly, the first thing that came to mind was the time that Rando hit every shot in a game. Sure, Shelley had already done it, but with all the players who bat for a high average in the league, nobody would have guessed Rando would be the second person to do it.

 

Dear Mac,

As anybody who follows the SBL knows, you are a former Player of the Year, so you know a thing or two about great players.  I have the fourth pick in my fantasy baseketball draft (yes, those exist), with the first three picks being Nate Tomko, Terry Shernisky, and Bryan Frankovich.  There are a few players I've had my eye on, but all have big question marks.  For instance, who knows if Shelley Goodpastor will be around this summer?  Will Mikey Moroco be able to shine with B-Frank gobbling up all the RBIs?  Will Ben Smith finally show some consistency and play to a high level week in and week out?  Will Matt McClelland or Terry Hall be around enough?  Will Jon Biddle learn some offense?  Can you also explain what, if any, chance they have of being mentioned alongside the big three by season's end?  Thank you so much, Matthew. 

 

With lust,

MacIsMcDreamy@sbl.com

 

Dear Dreamy,

 

I have been trying to get in on a fantasy baseketball league for years now. With all the other crap we have at the web page, you’d figure someone other than Nate would step up and make this happen. As I have mentioned in the past, the level of talent drops after the “big three.” If you had the fourth pick in the draft, I would not go with any of the players you suggested. Here’s why:

 

Shelley Goodpastor: is anything but a sure thing after missing last season.

 

Mikey Moroco: with Frankovich already crowned as the RBI man, that leaves Mike as second banana.

 

Ben Smith: Using the 4th pick on someone who is capable of playing like Tomko makes sense. Wasting it on someone who played like Mike Frankovich for the majority of last season does not.

 

Matt McClelland and Terry Hall: have improved every year they’ve been in the league, but still leave more questions than answers.

 

Jon Biddle: has never had much of an offense…and let’s not forget he wasn’t as dominant on the glass last year either.

 

No, there is one name you left of this list…a name that happens to be that of my fourth pick, Jon Olsavsky. This season has all the makings of a resurgence for Jon. He has many doubters, got picked to a team with people he likes, and must be missing the SBL after missing a lot of time last year. I think he’ll be in HOF form this year. But, if you don’t want to risk it, taking a gamble on rookie sensation Tony Mastrian wouldn’t be a bad move either.

 

Dear Mac,

I am a captain this year!  Words cannot describe my excitement when Nate named me one of the captains for this year's teams.  With a nucleus of Mikey Moroco, Pat Nespor, and Mike Frankovich, many have pegged my team as the early favorite to win it all.  However, we're lacking two things:  a name and a true leadoff hitter.  Do you have any ideas for a good name for my team?  Who should bat leadoff?  Is it Mikey? I love Mikey being right in front of me, batting, that is.  You put my team at number one in your preseason power rankings.  Does this mean that I will finally hoise the left-eye in August so I can finally celebrate along side a certain someone who I've had my eye on?  Will he love me forever? Will he make me so happy for the rest of my life?  Will he take me away and will he make me his wife, err, husband?  I gotta know right now!

 

Sincerely,

KennedyBBalla

 

Dear Balla,

 

First off, just let me say that I love the Meatloafish ending to your letter. Paradise by the Dashboard Light truly is an underrated song, and Meatloaf had one of the best sets of pipes in music history. As far as the name for team K-Y, I’m not going to touch that one with a ten foot pole…though I’m sure this team will have quite a bit of pole touching going on. Someone recently implied that we should let Nate’s neighbor Rob play this year to become the first professional sport to have openly gay athletes. I had to remind them that Frankovich and double M broke that barrier many years ago. They just can’t quit each other. That said, I don’t like either Bryan or his “partner” in crime leading the other one (except on the dance floor). The answer has to be Mike Frankovich. Despite his awfulness at defense, the MFer has shown that he can occasionally hit those singles and doubles with consistency. I think he has to be the leadoff man.

 

 

3.  Dear Mac,

I love the SBL.  I have been a fan since day one.  I love the personalities, the scrums, the psyche-outs, and Nate getting pissed off at this team over missed double plays among other things.  One thing that I do not love is the fact that so many of my favorite personalities end up leaving the valley to pursue their life goals (assuming that baseketball glory isn't at the top of their life goals).  Andy Esenwein, Teddy Ballgame, Joel Lepak, and Jason Betts used to really float my boat and now they are nowhere to be seen on Sunday afternoons.  I've read Nate's article about players that need to come back.  So now, answer me, these questions three:  1.)  Who are your favorite "missing" SBL personalities?; 2.)  What "missing" players do you think may make a return soon; and 3.)  Which personalities do you fear may be leaving the valley soon?  Thank you.

 

Forever yours,

Mr. Hennon

 

Dr. Mr. Hennon,

 

I will try to answer your questions in the same succinct way in which you asked them:

 

Question #1: Nate and I will agree on many of these, but I would put them in a different order as I missed the first two years of hilarity.

 

5) Joel Lepak- Though I missed most of his reign of terror, it’s clear to me that a lot of the fun left the league for Michigan when he did.

 

4) K-Unit- One of my first acts to gain noticed in the SBL was a balls out scrum that left the Unit and I both a bloody mess. Something about Kurt just makes me want to inflict and receive pain.

 

3) Seth Salcedo- This kid was comic gold. If he thinks being 6’2” and weighing 230 is going to stop Nate and I from giving him a super wedgy like the days of old, he may have another thing coming.

 

2) Lenny H. Crist- The first stranger who talked to me when I came to the SBL, Lenny also has my vote for funniest. Something about a dude wearing tight plaid shorts while reading Hamlet is beautiful.

 

1) Mr. Ballgame- While I have promised not to print his name on this site in any of my articles, that doesn’t stop me from missing the big guy and the humor he brings to the hearts of the children. These last few years haven’t been as special w/o my mentor in tow.

 

Question #2: Of my list, I think that Lenny and Seth are likely to play in a few games. The others I don’t think have much of a chance to suit up this year.

 

Question #3: The two people I think may be leaving the valley sooner rather than later also happen to be the SBL’s two smartest (at least in IQ). I’d be surprised if Pat Lackey and Jamie Morocco didn’t move on to better things…which sucks, as they are in my top 10 favorite SBL people.

Dear Mac,

 

Ben Smith in his column recently made public the rumored possible trade between himself, Lee, and a third team. How do you think this will affect your team’s season, and what is the status of Ben and Jamie’s relationship?

 

Love,

Slighted in the Shenango Valley

 

Dear Slighted,

 

I will not claim to have all of the answers, but I do have some inside knowledge of the situation. From what I have heard, Lee Nespor had the crazy idea of getting Jamie Morocco for someone of little value. Ben then suggested that it would take someone like Billy Weisburg to pry Jamie from his hairy grasp. It didn’t take long for the SBL offices to nix the deal, as PJ and L have been known to cut many a shady deal before the season. In the end, I think it hurt the team to have Ben make it public, but Jamie staying means that I will be happy. I don’t forsee Ben and Jamie having many problems…until she 2 months pregnant with my child.

 

 

 

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